The Thin Blue Line Separating Me from Serving on a Jury
Starting Monday, I will be doing my civic duty by reporting for jury duty. So, next week's content could be affected, in both quantity and quality. The last time I checked, "producing video recipes," wasn't on the list of acceptable reasons for being excused.I've always thought juries should be made up exclusively of retired senior citizens, and homeless drifters. I won't go into the specific of my plan, but it makes sense on many levels.
Luckily, I have many connections to law enforcement, which can be used to get out of jury duty if you know how to work it. In criminal cases, you are always asked if you have any relationships to law enforcement. Bias towards the police over a defendant is a big no-no.
So, once I list all my relatives that are cops, I'll be sure to say a few things like, "If they weren't guilty, why would they have been arrested?" and "I don't have a problem with police bending the rules if it keeps the scum off the streets." To be safe, I'll also be wearing my "Shoot First and Ask Questions Later" t-shirt. Wish me luck!
Photo (c) Flickr User Clearly Ambiguous
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